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"The Implacable Screaming Mogambo (ISM) goes freaking berserk at the economic
insanity of it all as he watches, horrified, as asset prices get bid higher
and higher in a boiling frenzy of speculation with all of this new Federal
Reserve money and credit, and which will end badly when the Ponzi game falls
apart..."
The headline on Wolfgang Munchau's column was titled "Recession Is Not The
Worst Possible Outcome", in the Financial Times. I naturally assumed that he
was referring to the inevitable "outcome" after the stupid Federal Reserve
created so damned irresponsibly much money and credit over the last few decades,
so that the corrupt government could borrow a cumulative $10 trillion and institute
innumerable new government programs and agencies, paid for by reaping enormous
floods of tax revenues during the economy's decades-long buying-and-selling
spree in response to this irresponsible monetary and fiscal orgy of gluttony.
Which, I admit, sounds real nice!
I was pleased, therefore, as he seemed to be doing my very bidding in insulting
the Federal Reserve when he first talks about Hyman Minsky's "financial instability
hypothesis", which postulates that long-term economic stability breeds its
own instability through a "vicious circle" of rampant financial speculation
and Ponzi financing, which grows and grows until, at its "Minsky Moment", the
frauds are revealed, and it all collapses in a heap of instability and chaos.
The predictable result, of course, is that the Implacable Screaming Mogambo
(ISM) goes freaking berserk at the economic insanity of it all as he watches,
horrified, as asset prices get bid higher and higher in a boiling frenzy of
speculation with all of this new Federal Reserve money and credit, and which
will end badly when the Ponzi game falls apart, as Ponzi schemes must, which
is why Ponzi scams are illegal in all 50 freaking states and every country
in the world, but still unbelievably legal in the budgeting of the damned federal
government!
As examples of Ponzi schemes going bust, look at Social Security and Medicare!
I was hoping that he would then segue into Mogambo Invasion Plan Number One
(MIPNO), which is how the whole country should rise as one and storm Washington,
D.C. with flaming torches and a steaming, screaming sense of outrage, run every
government employee either out of town or into prison, or both, and install
The Wise And Wonderful Mogambo (TWAWM) as Omnipotent Emperor Mogambo (OEM)
with a fabulous, fabulous salary and benefit package.
Failing that, maybe he could expose the stupid-yet-fraudulent idea of a whole
nation "investing long-term in the stock market to fund a retirement" to be
the stinking lie that it is!
I mean, not only is it mathematically impossible, and not only has it never
happened anywhere in the whole history of the world, but it is not happening
now, either, as implied by Mark Gongloff, writing at blogs.wsj.com's Marketbeat,
whose article is titled, "Lost Decade".
I think I vaguely remember being drunk when I saw the movie The Lost Weekend,
which was about alcoholism (always a fun topic!) and the title The Lost Decade
is just as unsavory, and rightfully so, because he explains, "Adjusted for
inflation and dividends, the return on the S&P 500 was negative for the
decade that ended on June 30." Hahaha! Ten years of nothing! No growth in buying
power for 10 years! Hahahaha! Nice "investing for the long-term" there!
So, anyone investing in the S&P 500, which is just a compilation index
of the 500 biggest companies in America, for the last 10 years produced negative
real (inflation-adjusted) results? Hahaha! And you are going to fund a retirement
by never gaining any buying power? Hahahaha!
But he did not mention any of this, and so naturally I am wondering why in
the hell he is wasting my time with it. Well, it turns out that the reason
Mr. Munchau brings this up at all is that he gets into explaining about "New
Keynesianism" which is, "in fact, probably the most influential macroeconomic
theory of our time. At the heart of the doctrine stands the so-called dynamic
stochastic general equilibrium model, nowadays the main analytical tool of
central banks all over the world."
Hahaha! It even sounds stupid! "Dynamic stochastic general equilibrium model"!
Hahaha!
Mr. Munchau apparently does not see the humor, and ignores me by going on, "In
this model, money and credit play no direct role. Nor does the financial market.
The model's technical features ensure that financial markets have no economic
consequences in the long run."
I can see the obvious advantages of never suffering the consequences of my
actions, and I am busily taking notes to use at my next Employee Annual Performance
Survey! Whee!
Almost as an understatement, he says, "This model has significant policy implications." I
think to myself, "I am waaAAAaaaay ahead of you, dude!"
"One of them," he goes on, "is that central banks can safely ignore monetary
aggregates and credit. They should also ignore asset prices and deal only with
the economic consequences of an asset price bust." Wow!
I was going to interrupt to make some rude comments about such a theory and
some more rude comments about the Federal Reserve for even contemplating such
absurdities, as I am sure that they parallel his own. But since I figure that
it is good to know a guy who writes for the Financial Times, what better way
to ingratiate myself than to agree with him?
Then he hits me between the eyes with the sledgehammer of, "They should also
ignore headline inflation"!!!! Note the clever way I used four exclamation
points as punctuation to indicate anger, horror, stark terror and homicidal
outrage!
By this time, I am in dire need of medications to calm my pounding heart,
and even he cautiously suggests, ever the gentleman, that "we might want to
question whether the recipes that got us into this mess are also most suited
to get us out again." Hahaha! "Also suited!" Hahahaha! What a wonderfully dry
sense of humor! Hahaha!
He sums up by saying that to forestall the deserved collapse of the bloated,
malignant economic system as currently constituted with more and more heroic
monetary and fiscal insanity, and more and more governmental policy blunders,
means that "a recession is not the worst possible outcome. The worst is for
this crisis to go on and on, for Minsky's moment to become an eternity."
Constant collapse. Brrrr! Thank goodness for the warmth of gold and silver
against such a chill!
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